I'm a dog. Honest.
i like cheese and soap. i feel love to eat dog biscuits, very nice! i especially enjoy poopy scooping. I love doing it doggy style, I'm so cute and handsome and always wear my favourite t-shirt ('i got rabies'), but seriously, i think i do, i just tried to kill a bath. so....
but don't worry, apart from my stinking odour, aggressive nature, tendency to maul and unbelievably erratic bladder, I'm a great guy/girl/turkey.

I'm open to whatever i can get really, except pugs, the last time i met one it bit of my leg, but its OK, my owner got to it with super glue sharpish, its all better now.

Some of my personal hobbies are studying shakespeare, learning Pi and contemplating life, i also like to get hit by cars and eat my poop.
please write on my wall,... please....seriously, please... i am so desperate.